046: iDon'tCare

It's a phone.

Yeesh.

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iDon'tCare
Words and Music © 2007 by Tom Smith
Released under a Creative Commons Noncommercial ShareAlike License


Everyone is lining up
To get the latest toy
With every fancy buzzword
The reviewers can deploy

It's a wireless browser,
Music player, and a phone,
Well, listen up, you Apple junkies,
'Cause I've got my own

It's called
iDon'tCare
Amazing gadgetry
iDon'tCare
The latest in ennui
It tells me if what's cool or hot
Actually matters -- usually not

iDon'tCare
The new technology
iDon'tCare
It's more than sophistry
All it does has been done before,
But now it's clumsier and costs more

Every permutation, every
Variance in hue
Is sold across the nation as if
It was bold and new

Slim responsive elegance,
Such sexiness and grace
It's like a high-priced hooker
With a logo on her face

iDon'tCare
'Cause I don't need to own
iDon'tCare
Another telephone,
If it's worth all this noise and hype,
How come it's not as clear as Skype?

iDon'tCare
I haven't got the time
iDon'tCare
To shift a paradigm,
I only want to play a song,
Good thing that my thumbs are strong

So many times we've seen this sort of marketing before
You can buy a brand-new lifestyle at your favorite store
Give up your apartment, your sedan and both your jobs,
To gently stroke the touchscreen and twiddle with the knobs

It may make stuff more fun to do,
But keeping track is hard
Did you just win at Sudoku
Or max out your credit card?

It's guaranteed to change your life,
It really is da bomb
Like Windows ME, the Segway,
PSP and Pets dot com

iDon'tCare
Your life is more compact
iDon'tCare
With a two-year contract
The Steves have got a perfect plan
To feed your short attention span

iDon'tCare
And so I'll muddle through
iDon'tCare
'Cause I've got things to do
And if the future's passed me by
I won't complain 'cause I'll know why
They have new crap to buy and I
Don't care.